Tuesday, July 30, 2013

Real Intimacy, Real Growth (Part 3)

Its NOT About Communication.

At least not as much as people think. So many times couples focus on communication and compromise as a foundation for their relationship. This is only half right.

Most couples don't have a problem communicating. 

Most couples know what each other wants, but they are unable to change. Couples therapy is not that simple. Communication skills are a foundation, but not as important as people think. Couples therapy is about creating CHANGE! Often couples know how to say what they want, and their partner hears what they are asking. Most couples do not have a problem communicating, but have a problem growing. Bethany and Blaine kept trying to do things for each other, but then resented each other for it. Blaine and Bethany kept saying what their partner wanted to hear, but neither one was willing to grow. Bethany wanted things to be more exciting (especially in the bedroom) but this only made Blaine feel inadequate. Blaine wanted Bethany to be more understanding of his depression and help him feel better. This couple did not need to communicate better they needed to grow and move in a new direction.

No comments:

Post a Comment